How to meet girls at the gym, a woman's perspective.

Contrary to popular belief, the gym is a great spot to fill your Friday night date slot… Like your fitness program, you just need to train and have the technique right.

Contrary to popular belief, the gym is a great spot to fill your Friday night date slot… Like your fitness program, you just need to train and have the technique right

The rules for picking up girls at the gym are the same as those for getting fit: Be realistic, take it slow, and don’t push it too hard. These will make picking a girl up easier than picking up your next PR. From one gym bunny, here’s how to get her focus on working out…

That is, with you.

Before I dive into these tips, there’s some basic “gym-douche” behavior that’s automatically going to get me running in the other direction (no matter how much cardio I’ve done).

What not to do.


It’s bad enough I catch you staring at my ass while I’m squatting or running. It’s worse when I see you staring at every ass that walks by… It’s just pervy.

It’s equally awkward when you’re staring at YOURSELF in the mirror. I get the glance to check your form, but no one needs to see you flexing for yourself. Get your head out of your ass, King Douche, and stare at those weights you should be lifting.


Grunting should be reserved for intense matches of tennis, and occasionally the bedroom... not your weights circuit. I get the occasional sigh when really pushing yourself, but in no way should you be grunting every. single. rep. of. your. set. It’s not showing off. I do hear you. Stop.

Ego Feeding

As the Fergie once said, “I be up in the gym just workin’ on my fitness.” Stressing the importance of my fitness; nothing is worse than when a guy tries to make “me-time” about him.

I get you squat 300 lbs and have great form. Try boosting my ego rather than feeding yours. Don’t be condescending to anyone in the gym… don’t show me how to lift better, and especially don’t call me babydoll or sweetheart.

What you should be doing.

Now, you’re on your way to being a gym rat that girls don’t avoid like the plague. Here’s some help on how to score that girl’s number…

Be realistic

Not about the girls you’re talking to, but about your motivation. If you’re at the gym solely to meet women… turn around, save yourself $40 a month, and go get a good arm workout at home (if you know what I mean.) You should be at the gym because you want to better yourself; meeting potential women should just be a bonus.

Take it slow

Like growing your muscles, you can’t pick them all up at once. It’s not speed dating or the bar, so don’t chat up every woman you see. You’ll end up with a bad reputation with the everyone at the gym… especially the women. Pick and choose who you’re really digging, and go for it.


Just go for it. There will be no “perfect moment” to approach her. Just pick a ‘down’ moment in her workout like between sets or during a water break, and go for it.

The longer you hover, the weirder it gets. Going up to a woman at the gym should be no different to anywhere else. You should feel comfortable talking to us wherever. It’s 100% alright to approach a woman that you’re attracted to. Just be confident with yourself… It goes a long way.

Also: Never, ever interrupt a girl in the middle of a workout.

Don't be that "Pick up" guy

Don’t try to be a dick to impress her. (This applies everywhere, not just the gym). Go over, say hi, and strike up a conversation. If you don’t know what to talk about, ask her about her workout or what she would recommend doing for muscle ‘x’.

It can go beyond the work-out. If you feel like you’re clicking, ask her to get post-gym smoothies or ask for her number. Tell her you need a new workout buddy.  

Here's a great method you should try the next time you're going to do some cardio: Jump on a treadmill or an elliptical. Aim for the middle one, chances are that a hot girl will jump on next to you. Turn around, say hi, and chat before she starts running.

Like you listen to your muscles… listen to her body language. If she doesn’t seem like she’s into it, don’t push it. She could just want her space and you could end up burning in more ways than one.

Make it Simple.

There's no reason to make this complicated, and there's certainly no reason to avoid talking to a girl you're attracted to at the gym. So long as you're there to work out as your first priority, you can continue to be social and get a date lined up for the upcoming week.

Follow these, and I promise… like your gains, just have patience and results will come.

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