How to Ask a Girl out Over Text (with REAL Example)

How to Ask a Girl out Over Text (with REAL Example)

You might be wondering how to ask a girl out over text.

Well, I’m going to show you how.

Using a real example.

And a simple magic trick.

One that you’ll be able to duplicate.

What Tinder Girls and Vegans have in Common.

Swig & Swine BBQ

To show you this magic trick, I’ll first need to set it up.

With a little back story.

But trust me, it’s worth it.

After all, this trick would fool Penn and Teller.

Don’t worry though.

But I'm not a magician so I'll reveal the trick.

It all started when I went to have BBQ.

At this joint is called Swig & Swine in South Carolina...

You'll recognize it by the butchered pig out-front.

Exclaiming "horrifying vegetarians since 2013!"


Tough Living.

Personally, I rarely eat meat.

Only when I’m traveling.

But there I was with a plate Burnt Ends, Smoked Turkey and more.

Hey, I'm a man with weaknesses, too.

Then in comes a young man to order take out.

We'll call him Bill.

We got to talking, and told him I was visiting from out of state.

And he told me that Charleston has "the best fried chicken you'll ever damn have!"

He paused, sighed, and told me "but I'm trying to cut down on the stuff."

"See, my father just passed from heart disease."

"And my uncle. And grandfather. And Grandmother.”

“All young too. I'm only 25 myself, already have symptoms."

He gave a long stare at his beer and continues.

"I've got a 2 year old now, and another one coming."

"I'd love to live enough long to see the grow up."

"Maybe see their kids, too."

But Bill shrugged.

He know that wasn't likely to happen.

And I knew it too.

A Furious Vegan

Let's change gears here for a second.

Because I keep scrolling back up to that "horrifying vegetarians" pig.

Now, let's assume that a Vegan DID walk in to that restaurant and sat down with us.

To scold both of us for eating this greasy slop.

  • He'd BERADE us for eating meat. (It's unethical.)

  • He'd SCREAM at us that meat isn't sustainable.

  • He’d LECTURE us that it’s destroying the environment.

  • He'd THROW BLOOD on us that there are alternatives that taste just as good.

All of which is… pretty much true.

(Wait a minute, where do Vegans even get the blood from?!)

How Would You React?

Well, faced with all that, what could we possibly do?

Wait, I know.

How about get pissed and put up a sign out front says "Horrifying Vegetarians?"

Or how about eat 3 steaks for everyone 1 the Vegan doesn't eat?


The Big Reveal

Oh, sorry, I got side tracked...

We were talking about magic tricks, right?


Well, here it is:

How do you get people to not do what you want?

You tell them to do it.

  • You tell them: You NEED to be vegan because you're a bad person if you don't!

  • You tell them: GIVE me your number (with no prior context.)

  • You tell them: BUY Tinder 10X because it's the BEST Tinder Profile Course out there. (Ok that's true, but still.)

When you tell people what to do, they will -- like MAGIC -- do the opposite just to smite you.

What this has to do with Texting

It's so true though!

I catch myself doing things out of spite I normally wouldn't do.

Just because you told me not to do it!

Back to Bill.


I almost forgot to finish the story of my new friend Bill.

After he told me about wanting to live long enough to live to see his kids grow up...

I mentioned, "You know, I read a few studies directly linking meat to cardiovascular disease."

He raised his brow and laughed while shaking his head.

"I could never do that, I love fried chicken too much."

I smiled and shrugged, "True, but, I bet you love your kids more."

It took a second before the thought soaked in to him and he remained silent for a long time.

A few minutes later his carry out arrived.

(What else but fried chicken?)

And he left with it, giving me a little toast with his glass.

Now, I'll never know what happened to him.

If he tossed that chicken down the trash shoot or not.

But I'm willing to bet he'll eat one less plate fried chicken in his life after meeting me.

And had he met a "Vegan" he would've eaten three more.

Planting the Seed

Delicious Pie

So remember, on Tinder or otherwise...

If you want something, plant the seed in their head.

Don't tell people what they need to do.

Suggest to them a solution that will help solve a problem they already have.

That way you can have your non-Vegan pie, and convince people to go Vegan, too.

To win, you need to be strategic.


Looking at a Real Example on Texting

Now you want to see an example how to ask a girl out over text?

Sorry... I've got nothing.

I'm kidding!

In our FB group, Tim posted this status:

Looking for help after a girl canceled on him.

Inviting a Girl Out via Text

TL;DR, girl canceled on him the day of their proposed date.

And admittedly he was pissed.

But is it possible to change the girls mind?

  • By leaving a passive aggressive respond, like a Vegan; the answer is NO.

  • By trying to BEG her to come, the answer is NO.

  • By saying "Oh come on, just come." The answer is still NO.

So... is there anything you can do? YES.

Here's what I told him:

The Solution

Screenshot of Zirby Tinder Advice

I gave him the EXACT line to copy and paste to her.

It boils down to figuring out a solution to her problem.

Her problem is NOT having guys to hang out with.

Just like Bill's problem is NOT helping our animal friends out.

All that it took was to understand what her problem was.

And my line did that.

It Really Works

Guess what?

She showed up for the date.

Here's the screenshot of their conversation.

Getting a Date on Tinder Example

The whole point here is to be smart, and persistent.

Not pushy.

If you want to ask a girl out over text…

And she’s being difficult, or cancels on you, or anything else…

Just identify the biggest benefit for her.

And play that angle.

It’s a beginner’s mistake to worry about yourself first.

Remember, Denny…

Remember, don't be a Vegan.

Be a person that chooses not to eat meat.

Or do whatever the hell you want…

Marc Falzon Zirby

Marc Falzon

Marc is the founder of Zirby, the world’s most read Tinder & Online Dating resource, with over 4 million readers a year. You can reach out to Marc via email here, or follow him on Instagram.