4 Tinder Openers that ACTUALLY Get Her Attention (+ Real Screenshots)

Are you Tinder opening messages not getting a response back? No problem.

By the end of this article, you're going to have 4 Tinder openers that work and get responses back.

Also, this isn’t just a bunch of text… it includes screenshots too!

Each opener includes screengrabs of the convos so you can see it in action.

The best part is you can always keep these strategies on hand so if you're stuck just call on one of these to get rolling. 

To make these even easier for you, at the end of the article I included a free downloadable PDF that breaks down a real Tinder conversation, line by line. 

First messages on Tinder that Women Respond to.

Opener 1 - The Power of Emojis on Tinder

If you're familiar with Zirby you already know that we don't recommend sending many (or any) emojis.

There are solid reasons for this.

Mainly: it makes you look like a teenage girl.

But rules are meant to be broken, right?

So we're not just going to break this rule… we’re going to dive bomb it.

Our first strategy is going pure emoji. 

The goal with this strategy is to get her attention as fast as possible and then move on from there.

Simple Emoji Opener

Using Emoji's on Tinder can Work.

In the case above I made sure that the emoji I used looked like me.

I know it's simple, but the most effective Tinder messages are always personalized.

Even if it's a little teeny bit personalized, it still helps.

Keep that in mind with your own messages.

If you include an emoji that represents her, customize it so... it looks like her.

The key is after she responds it's time to drop the emoji and move into communicating as a man.

From this point, I would literally choose something specific to her in and write about that. 

Opener 2 - The Emoji Story Opener

Okay, we're batting 2 for 2 now.

It turns out that we can harness even more power out of that little emoji by taking things to the logical conclusion: making an elaborate visual story.

After-all, who didn't like picture books as a kid? This is a fun one.

You can write out a full elaborate story about you both doing something together.

Maybe it's a getaway adventure which ends in her getting pregnant than killing you for you insurance money. 

Or, maybe it's something else entirely.

Just keep it funny and engaging - it's a puzzle for her to figure out.

I actually got this idea by sending a similar cute message to my ex-girlfriend.

It went well!

Again, make sure that you customize the emoji's to look like her.

Taking Risks on Tinder

Sending Emojis on Tinder

And as always, the more custom you make your elaborate emoji story, the more effective it will be when you send it.

The black hair girl emoji matched what she actually looked like.

Give it a try.

The more outlandish you make it - the better.

In this case it also had some PG13 moments.

Because as we’ve mentioned in our complete Tinder Guide post, taking risks in your Tinder Messages usually pays off.

That doesn't hurt as these kind of messages come across light and fun.

Opener 3 - Using Gifs in Your Opening Message

This is my low-key favorite way to start conversations on Tinder.

Now, keep in mind that most guys are sending Gifs of bears waving... head nods.

That doesn't mean it won't work for you but we can take things to the next level.

By customizing the Gifs to something that you see in her profile or is unique to her.

And if you couple that with a short line (so she sees the connection) you've got a real winner.

Remember, not everyone will immediately connect the Gif to something in their own profile because let's face it - we rarely read our own bios once they are set.

Using Humor in Your Gif

Screenshot of a Gif on Tinder

In the above example, I saw that she was holding up a cat in the same way as from the Lion King.

Again, the goal is to be personal.

Avoiding generic Gifs, I sent her one that was directly related to something in her profile and took it to that next level by adding a simple line of text below it "Cats. ^"

That injected my sense of humor (and dislike of cats) into the message.

Another Example of a Gif Opener

Funny Gif on real Tinder Screenshot

Don't underestimate how strong this combination is.

Being personal always is more effective.


Plus it leads the conversation into a natural segway.

I don't have to worry about, "Okay, what do I say next?" 

Opener 4 - How to Create Personalized Openers

In my opinion, by far the most effective Tinder opener.

Sure, it might not be flashy like the Gif or emoji. But it's the gold standard.

Not every girl will respond to Emojis.

After-all, that can be a bit immature.

And not every girl will be millennial enough for your Gif. 

But a personal message works.

Guys often times will send generic copy-pasted lines to lots of women because they are worried that a lot won't respond.

Therefore, they don't want to waste time writing everything out personally.

This advice is hardly new. Even OkCupid figured that out long ago.

It's a positive feedback loop (which is not a positive thing) where the fewer responses you get the more likely you might be to send more copy-pasted lines in an attempt to "cast a bigger net."


What you should be doing is becoming more personal when you notice a drop in your response rate.

Yes, you’re primarily looking at her looks when you swipe right. But she’s looking for a real connect. Remember, she can step out at any moment and go to any bar to find a guy more attractive than you. She’s on here to have her mind stimulated. You do that by being personal.

Personalized Openers are Easy.

You're probably thinking "That's fine, but I still don't want to spend all day writing out super personalized messages."

And that’s fair.

We don't either.

The truth is you can be concise and comment on the smallest thing from her profile and still get big results.

In the same amount of time, or less, than finding and using a copy pasted line.

 Let's look at some examples.

Girls Love Plaid

A Successful Tinder Conversation

In the screenshot above, one of her photos had her wearing plaid.

That's it.

That's how simple this really can be.

She responded well, and I ended up going on a great date with her.

See? Not complicated.

You really can make this very easy on yourself. Let's take a peek at another one.

Talk About Where She’s From

A Good Opening Message on Tinder

That “little thing” you pick from her profile is called the “hook.”

The hook can be something you see in her photos, or in her bio.

But it also can be the locations she’s from.

Case and point, this girl is from German, where my good friend is from.

All I need to do is relate where she’s from to something in my life and we have a winning combination.

Opener 5 - Keeping it Concise (Bonus Tip!)

One thing we need to cover is keeping things concise.

The best opening message on any online dating platform is going to be short and sweet.

And once you send it, that laid back, fun, and personal vibe that comes across in your opening message should continue in your text messages.

The worst mistake you can make is being too long-winded.

Tinder is meant to be fast.

So stay personal, but limit the number of characters to about 65.

She’s a Dancer.

An easy Tinder Opener

In this example, she mentioned she was a dancer in her profile.

My opening line couldn’t be better.

And you can see just how simple and easy it was to send it.

By saying “interpretive dance” it shows my sense of humor.

But also that I “get” that dance isn’t just hip hop.

Remember, keep your messages small.

bad opening line on tinder

Why Long Openers don’t Work

I see way too many guys in our private Facebook group, Own Your Online Dating, posting lines for feedback.

They are sooooo long and drawn out.

Of course the girl isn’t going to respond!

If David read this article, maybe he wouldn’t have made that mistake.

Not only is that message too long… it’s also not personalized.

Women don’t want to meet a strange online.

To get past this hurdle, you need to show your personality.

You do this with a good opener.


Going from Opener to Conversation

We’ve covered how to craft and opening line that gets attention.

And dates.

But we haven’t spoken about how to transition from your opener in to the actual conversation.

We’ve covered that in some detail in our full Tinder Guide post. It’s worth a read.

Though I rather show you an example take from the screenshots above in this post.

So to do that, I have the entire conversation between myself an the example in tip #5.

You’ll see exactly what the rest of that conversation was like.

And how I was able to get her number and eventually bring her out on the date.

You can get the Breakdown of this Tinder conversation 100% free. Just click here, or the link button below to see it and we'll email you the full PDF. 

Alright guys, that's it for now.

Be sure to let me know in the comments below if you found any of these tips helpful (or if you scored a few dates from one of them!)

I read (and reply) to every comment posted on the Zirby blog, so don’t feel shy.

Marc Falzon

Marc Falzon

Marc is the founder of Zirby, the world’s most read Tinder & Online Dating resource, with over 3 million readers a year. You can reach out to Marc via email here, or follow him on Instagram.